


Dialtones

by spacegems



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Allydia - Freeform, Canon Death, Friendship, Grief/Mourning, Hurt/Comfort, I Miss Allison, One Shot, Other, Teen Wolf, cliche voicemail mourning, tw spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-10
Updated: 2015-10-10
Packaged: 2018-04-25 16:47:01
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,115
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4968619
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spacegems/pseuds/spacegems
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Lydia finds herself missing her best friend on a particularly shitty night.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dialtones

_"Allison!"_

Lydia tip-toed into her house, carefully stepping over the areas of the floor that creaked. She'd done it so many times before that she didn't even have to think before she swiftly turned off the motion-light sensor. But instead of following routine and going upstairs, Lydia put her purse down and sunk onto the floor, her back against the cold kitchen counter. Her phone vibrated loudly in her purse and she frantically searched through it before her fingers wrapped around the cold metal. Lydia put her phone on mute and saw that the notification was a text from Stiles.

"Hey, you okay? Tonight was kinda intense."

She cracked a small smile and tapped her response.

"We've been through worse... I'll live. See you at school tomorrow."

Stiles replied with a "good night" and Lydia put her phone down. After Allison's death, Stiles made sure she was okay. He showed up at her house whenever she seemed slightly upset, hands full with ice cream and her favorite movies. And while they were kind gestures, they usually only reminded her of Allison. As for the rest of her friends... Everyone dealt with pain differently. The death of a friend should have brought them closer, but instead it just drove everyone apart. When Stiles wasn't around, Lydia was always alone with her thoughts.

Everyone in their pack had someone. Scott had Kira, Stiles had Malia, Liam had Mason... But Lydia just felt like the odd one out. She knew that she wasn't. She knew that she had the pack, but without Allison by her side, she was lost. Lydia could fend for herself, but Allison had been there throughout all of the emotion turmoil. Lydia thought that they would grow old together. She felt a tear slip out and wiped it away quickly. She hadn't cried in months. Every time she felt it coming, she held it back. She thought that she had to be strong for Allison. But crying didn't make you any less stronger, and she understood that now.

So Lydia let it all out. Months of suppressed emotions and anger and frustration spilled from her eyes, ruined her makeup, and stained her cheeks. Lydia let out a sob and squeezed her eyes shut. She'd forgotten how good it felt to cry and get everything out. As good as it felt, though, Lydia really just missed her best friend. She missed her smile, her witty jokes, her strength, her voice. Lydia pulled out her phone and went straight to her contacts. She tapped on Allison's icon and her finger hovered over the 'call' button.

Lydia drew a breath in and tapped the button, lifting the phone to her ear. The familiar ringing was loud in Lydia's ears as she waited with bated breath. After Allison's death, Chris set up a deal with her phone company to keep her voicemail open so that her friends and family could call her when they needed her. As it turned out, Lydia needed her a lot. She couldn't even remember how many voice-mails she had left. Or how many of them had been drunken voice-mails. But she knew that there were a lot of messages in her phone somewhere that would never be heard or answered.

The ringing eventually stopped and the pre-recorded voice recited the voice-mail instructions. Lydia took a deep breath as her best friend's voice flooded her ears. "Hey, it's Allison! I'm probably either busy fighting monsters or ignoring you. Leave me a message and I'll try to get back to you!" Lydia smiled sadly as the phone beeped.

"Hey, Allison... I, uh, I hope you're doing well right now," Lydia said, chuckling emotionlessly. "Maybe you're watching over me ... Maybe you're in some sort of afterlife. I hope you are. And I hope you're happy up there or down there or wherever... If you are watching over me, ignore the pathetic mess you see. I really needed to call you. Because I miss you so much. I miss you everyday, obviously, but today has just been really fucking awful. And I honestly don't know what to do. Everyone tells you to move on when someone dies. They tell you that they're in a better place, and they would want you to be happy. But the truth is, they don't know that. I don't know if you're in a better place, or if you're happier now. I'm sure you'd rather be alive than 'in a better place'."

Lydia swallowed the lump in her throat and continued. "What I do know is that you were always here for me in these moments. You always knew what to do. You always knew what made me feel better and you always knew the right things to say. What I do know is that you will never answer these calls. You will never respond to me in the graveyard. And it just isn't fair. Call me selfish, call me whatever you want, but I miss you so fucking much. I just wish I could see you, just one more time. I wish I could hug you or tell you that I love you one last time. Because I never got to. I never got to hear your last dying breath or hold your hand or... Why? Why did it have to be like that? It doesn't even feel real. Every time I text you or call you, I somehow expect you to pick up and start talking to me about Isaac or give me advice on my outfit... But it'll never happen. They say you move on. They say it gets easier. But it's been  _months_  and I miss you the same amount every damn day. I wish I could turn my emotions off. Or turn off these voices in my head."

"I'm trying to be strong for you, Allison, I  _really_  am," Lydia whispered. She paused and took a moment to put herself back together. "I won't stop trying, I promise. It just gets a little hard sometimes. But I'm going to get through this, for you. I'm not going to move on, because I don't want to. I don't ever want to forget the strongest person I knew. I want to keep every memory I have of you. And if there is some slight chance that you'll ever hear this, then I want you to hear the words I couldn't say to you in person. You were an amazing friend. And you gave me the ability to be strong. You helped me realize I was better than any crush or boy. I loved you. I  _love_  you. I miss you now and I'll miss you every day. Thank you."

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first story I've ever posted on here and I'm honestly really nervous but hopefully you enjoyed it! I know my writing's not that good, but I'm trying to improve. (I cried while writing this, I miss Allison so much) Thank you so much for reading! I'll take any requests/suggestions for my work!


End file.
